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I'm 21 years old, currently on a placement year...

July 13, 2016

"I'm 21 years old, currently on a placement year before I go on to complete the final year of my degree in September. I had a drunken one night stand with a guy I didn't even know on a night out in my hometown. I took the morning after pill about 15 hours later and thought everything would be fine but obviously the fertilisation had already taken place, because a week a half later when I was due on my period it didn't come.

 

I waited 6 days until I took a ClearBlue pregnancy test because I thought maybe the delay was due to the morning after pill. My friend was so supportive and I would recommend that even if you have one friend you can confide in, it's worth it! I wasn't planning on telling my parents and my brother but my mum found my pregnancy test in my bag, and it was a bit emotional and there was a lot of shock, but once that was all over, they were very supportive, and I'm honestly so glad I told them because I wouldn't have been able to go through this whole process without them.

 

The pregnancy test said I was positive which I was pretty shaken up about because I really thought that maybe my period was just late. I immediately got on to my local sexual health clinic who were very helpful - they gave me the walk-in times which were a couple of days later than I called. A couple of days after this I took the second pregnancy test which also confirmed I was pregnant.

 

On that Thursday I went to the walk-in clinic - I just wanted to make sure I was pregnant, and get an abortion referral straight away. It sounds ignorant and horrible, but it didn't even cross my mind that I wanted to keep a baby with a stranger - the circumstances were not right and I don't think it would have been the right decision.

 

At the clinic they gave me an abortion referral form and the GP told me who to get in contact with - Marie Stopes. I had an initial chat with a woman over the phone who asked me a few questions such as age, when my last period was etc. Then I had to wait over the weekend for a phone call on Monday where they asked further questions, why I wanted an abortion, my height and weight etc. Then I was passed through to the appointment booking process where I booked an appointment for the following Monday at my nearest available clinic that had a Marie Stopes centre, which was a train ride away.

 

The Marie Stopes site was so helpful and I read it corner to corner before I had my first appointment, which I would recommend because it tells you what to expect, and it put my mind at ease. At my appointment I had to sign a few forms and then I had to have an ultrasound. The woman couldn't find anything because the embryo must have been so small, so she couldn't see it amongst my muscles, so I had to have a vaginal scan, which they only put slightly into the vaginal opening a little, with a bit of lubricant, and she took four scans. I sort of saw the scans when she was typing in all the information, which I wasn't really ready for, but it didn't seem to bother me that much.

 

After the first pill (Mifepristone) I was sent straight home and I felt absolutely fine, absolutely no difference physically or mentally. My mum came with me for my second appointment, which I am very thankful for as I had a bit of a difficult, painful time. Before my appointment I found it really hard to eat breakfast and sicked it up, but felt better after this and had something else to eat. An hour before, I took 2 ibuprofen 400mg and 1 paracetamol 400mg. I had a little bit of bleeding on the train ride to the clinic.

 

When I went into the patient room, it was a bit daunting as there were so many tablets on the table. Four antibiotic tablets, and three other tablets. Honestly, I'm not 100% sure what they were but I honestly just wanted to get it over and done with. Then there were four tablets, the second set of abortion pills (Misoprostol) - you put two on on either side between your gum and cheek and keep them there for 30 minutes, as they are absorbed into your blood stream. I was allowed to go home after I had placed the tablets between my cheeks, and after 30 minutes rinsed them down with some water. I also had a depo-shot, a contraception method I had previously chosen to have at my first appointment. It's just a small prick at the top of your bum, and is just like a scratch, I think it's better than having to remember to take the contraceptive pill everyday.

 

Once I left the clinic I felt absolutely fine for about 20 minutes, then I was sitting waiting for the train and got sudden cramps, but they were bearable. I had been on the train about two minutes and started feeling quite awful. I had to go to the toilet and was sick and had some diarrhea. My mum and I then got off at the next stop, as I knew I wouldn't be able to carry on further on the train. I had terrible cramps and couldn't stop being sick. I was sick outside the station until I was sicking up nothing but bile. The station staff were so helpful giving me water and a sick bag.

 

We had to get a taxi home, and I had to try so hard the whole car journey not to be sick and the pain kept coming in waves. As soon as I got home I was sitting on the toilet for about an hour, with bad cramps, diarrhea and a lot of blood coming out. I was also sick again. I just stayed in bed for the rest of the day.

 

I would say in total, with the worst pain in terms of cramps and feeling horrible was about 4-5 hours. I had a hot water bottle as well against my stomach which helped a lot. I also continued to take ibuprofen every 3-4 hours. Honestly, I'd say the pain was maybe a little bit worse than really excruciating period pains I used to get when I was younger, as this used to cause me to be sick too. It is obviously different for everybody, but for me it hurts, so please be prepared.

 

It's now the second day since I took the second lot of tablets yesterday and I am still bleeding but it is more like a heavy period now. I haven't had any more cramps. I'm not sure if I have passed the pregnancy yet, but I have read that sometimes you don't even notice. I was 7 weeks pregnant when I took the abortion pills, so maybe I won't see much in the way of an obvious sac being passed.

 

I've read a lot of abortion stories which say they felt empty and terribly sad after their abortion. Honestly, I feel fine, maybe a little weak and tired, but not sad. I know that I made the right decision for myself and my future, and I know that I will look back and always be proud of myself for being so brave and going through with this.

 

I made a silly mistake having drunken sex with a stranger. Everybody makes mistakes, and I was not about to let a drunken encounter drastically change my life. Abortion is a big thing, it will probably stay with me for the rest of my life, but I'm not ashamed of it, I know that the decision I made was the right one for me."  —Anonymous

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