For the longest time, I thought I was infertile...

“For the longest time, I thought I was infertile. I have no insurance, and couldn’t go to a specialist to find out, but my irregular and strangely painful periods seemed to be an indicator of a reproductive malfunction. My boyfriend and I had never actively tried to become pregnant, and we did take precautions just in case. But, somehow it still happened. I had never been pregnant before, and I was terrified. I have no insurance, I'm a year away from finishing my college degree, and I'm not even sure I want children at all. I certainly didn't want one by accident.

So, we talked it over and decided that an abortion would be our best option right now. So, at 7.5 weeks, I did what I had to. 2 hours after taking the misoprostol, nothing was happening except almost unnoticeable cramps, and I started to worry it wasn't going to work. My fears were alleviated about half an hour later when the bleeding started and the cramps worsened. It was worst around 4 hours after I took the medication, and that was when I passed the sac. There was light vomiting, and a lot of defecating, but all in all, it was not the most painful thing I've ever done. I was terrified of what I might feel, scared I would be brutally punished for my decision to rid my body of the potential for life. But it wasn't unbearable. Granted, I had taken promethazine and some pain medication as well, but I’ve had IBS flare ups worse than that.

And now, two days later, all I feel is relief. I can move on with my life and finish school; I can be who I'm meant to be. If, some day, I want to be a mother, I know that option is available to me now. I cannot express how amazing that feels. So, to anyone out there who is scared of the repercussions of an abortion: if you truly want it, if you're sure you do, I promise you will feel better when it's over. There is no shame in doing what you need to be happy and healthy.” - Sarah

#relief #scared #medicationabortion

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