“I'm 27 and last night I had my medical abortion. About me: I am in a committed relationship of 10 years. We have a son who is 2 1/2. He was more or less planned and welcomed with love and excitement. When I found out I was pregnant the second time, all I felt was fear and anxiety. I don't believe anybody needs a reason for their choice of whether or not to continue a pregnancy, but I'll tell you my reason anyway.
Our financial situation is not ideal. We are at least one month behind on all of our bills, and get a shutoff notice every month. We are both working and budgeting diligently but cannot seem to get caught up. We are in that area where we just barely aren't eligible for any kind of state assistance. So, no health insurance for me. When I can't pay my electric bill, I can't justify paying 200+ for health insurance every month. And you pretty much can't be pregnant and not have health insurance. Let alone deliver a baby. Then to think about the cost of having a newborn, all the time taken off for maternity leave... adding more to our already negative balance.
Another reason: we almost broke up about a month ago. Things were really rocky and depressing. We've since had better communication with each other and are putting effort in, but things are still very fragile. The financial and emotional stress of a second child would break us.
And the decision didn't come easy to me. What hurt me the most, is knowing that I do want to have another child. It's the sadness around wishing our situation was different. Wishing that we could accept this as a happy accident. But we couldn't.
We made the decision to terminate. It took me about a week to wrap my head around finalizing my decision. It was very emotional and we talked around in circles about it. Eventually I became solid in my decision and at peace, and ready to move past it.
Planned Parenthood was a decent experience. They made me go in a week before they gave me the pill and watch a really dumb video about my other "options". Took 15 minutes. A week later I went in to take my first pill. All of the ladies working there were extremely nice. They never once asked me "why did you make this choice." The only horrible thing about it was that I had to wait 6 hours, because I had to do urine, blood, and ultrasound as well as counseling before I was able to see the doctor and get my pill. And the protesters were out when I first walked in, but I had my headphones in and walked fast.
The next day, I felt kind of queasy, but okay. No worse than I had been feeling with the pregnancy. I had to work late that day and decided to take the second set of pills when I got home. I put the pills in my cheek on my way home. Started bleeding like 30 mins after I put them in my mouth. Things started moving about an hour after the pills dissolved. The motrin and tylenol I was told to take made it so I didn't hurt.
The actual passing just felt kind of weird, I had cramping, but not very painful and then got up to use the bathroom and it all just came out. That happened about 3 times, and then it was over. I did wake up about 2 hours later with cramps, but I think I was just kinda sore, and the motrin was starting to wear off so I took some more. The actual passing of the pregnancy was probably the easiest part of the whole process. It was over in about 2 hours.
This morning, I got up, felt fine and came to work. I feel less tired than when I was pregnant. I actually feel better physically. I feel like I am on my period today. I thought I would feel sad, or have some kind of emotional reaction. And maybe I still will at some point. The only thing that has me worried is that someone will find out about it and try to make me feel guilty. There are several people in my life that I know wouldn't agree with my decision, so I hope I can avoid that conflict. But I feel mostly relief, and thankful that I had this choice. I am ready to put this experience behind me and work at bettering my life.” —Anonymous