I’m 16 years old. I found out I was pregnant when I was 4 weeks...

"I’m 16 years old. I found out I was pregnant when I was 4 weeks. I have always been pro life and thought nothing could change that. I started to become attatched to the fact I was pregnant and I imagined myself 7-8 months pregnant and imagined what my baby would look like. I wasn't happy at first but I also wasn't upset. I was in shock but as soon as I found out I kind of fell in love with the fact I was pregnant even though I was so young, I still believed I could have this baby and raise it. I wanted to be honest!

I told my boyfriend straight away and he was in shock. He knew I was always against abortion! A week later I told my Dad and as soon as I told my dad he started telling me to get an abortion. In my head I knew I couldn't do that because I wanted my baby. I wanted to keep my baby and raise it and love it. My boyfriend then started talking about abortion and then I felt completely alone and felt as if I had no other choice than abortion. I was heartbroken and felt so alone. My boyfriend was confused as I was. He did want it, then he didn't, then he did. (He is 18).

I then completely felt numb to emotion about 7 weeks into pregnancy. I decided I will have an abortion. But I didn't want to. I knew no one would support me and everyone would look down on me if I was to keep the baby. I was heartbroken because I wanted this baby. Then at 8 weeks on the 6th January 2016, I had a surgical abortion. I got the plane to England with my dad and he waited while I was upstairs, they put me asleep and I woke up and got sick. I was in a lot of pain. Also emotional pain, I felt like something was missing, i immediately regretted it and I didn't cry once because I felt numb.

It was only yesterday. I'm still in a lot of pain and will be expecting a lot of depression over the next couple of years. I kept a picture of my scan. I'm unbelievably hurt and all I want is that baby back. I can never turn back time though which kills me, That baby was the only person in the world who knew what my heart beated from the inside. And I took that life away. My own child. I will always regret this decision and I strongly suggest anyone who is getting an abortion to not listen to anyone because it is completely your choice! Your baby, your choice! Never let anyone get in your head. I shared my story because so many girls are silent about their abortions. I hope this helps with anyone making a life decision this big Xxxx" —Anonymous

#international #regret #sadness

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