I have always been pro-life...

"I have always been pro-life, I would give a lecture to anyone willing to listen about why abortion should never be allowed. But then I became pregnant, at 22 following a one night stand on holiday in Spain that, due to the amount of alcohol I'd drunk, I couldn't even remember having.

As soon as I returned home to my long term boyfriend a week later I began having symptoms; the heightened sense of smell was the first thing I noticed, then the nausea. I took a pregnancy test a week later as I was aware that the hormones aren't always picked up by the test at an early stage. It was negative, I was shocked because deep down I knew, but also over the moon. Then my period never came and the symptoms became worse. I took another test-positive; my whole world fell apart.

I still dragged myself to uni that day, and for the rest of the month, I completed and handed in four assignments which got excellent marks and I went for a job interview and got the job. I will always attribute these achievements to the pregnancy; the feeling of strength that it gave me was incredible-but I knew I couldn't keep it. Explaining it to my boyfriend would have been impossible and my life is really just beginning, there are so many things I need to do first.

I still feel these are wholly selfish reasons and I don't think I will ever truly forgive myself for what I've done, but the reasons not to keep it outweighed the reasons to keep it and at 63 days I had a medical abortion. It was the most painful experience of my life, and 1 week on I am still mourning for what I lost. But I wouldn't change my decision. It's heart wrenching for any women, you just have to be safe in the knowledge that it really is for the best." —Anonymous

#prolife #notready #regret #bestdecision #international

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